Message of Butterfly

One night, I was having a delightful conversation with BM&TM. In which we were discussing the topic of "Change." We observed that so many people are afraid of change that they would rather be in the living hell that they are in and would fight you tooth and nail against you in order to stay in their misery. Why? Because there is a certain level of comfort in the known.

Look at a lot of people repeating the same pattern of behaviors and then complain, "Why does this always happen to me?" Well, because they keep going back to the pattern of behavior that is known and has a certain comfort. How many of us know people who complain about having horrible boyfriends or girlfriends and yet continue to date various clones of their horrible ex?! It takes a certain kind of strength to break out of the cycle, to get use to something that isn't known!

I read an article by Nicholas D. Kristof in the New York Times called "Loss of Innocence" in which he purchased the freedom of two teen prostitutes in Cambodia and arranged it so they would be reunited with their families they were taken from as young girls. One of the girls willingly went back to the brothel who had kidnapped her in the first place, and one can only guess that the real reason was the fear of the unknown and all the new variables that came into her life at this new life.

When I think of stories like that I am reminded of a story that TM told me:

A person noticed a butterfly struggling so very hard to break out of the chrysalis. The observer watched as the butterfly fought and fought and felt a little sorry for it and then watched as the butterfly finally broke free and flew off.

The observer then came across another butterfly struggling out of the chrysalis. This time, the observer thought she would help and so she cut the chrysalis so the butterfly wouldn't have to struggle and could just fly away.

But, the butterfly could not fly and ended up dying. The struggle of the butterfly out of the chrysalis was important and part of the process of strengthening the butterfly so when it finally did break out, it would have the strength to fly off on its own.

Sometimes, when you are going through what seems to be hell, is just a time in which you are are developing the strength for a new phase in life.  It's all a matter of perspective and perception. Unfortunately, most of us don't have the ability to see too far into the future, so we aren't able to see the immediate blessings of the situation we are going through at the moment and yet when we look back, we can see the gift of the struggle in our present situation and that it wasn't as horrible or as bad as we thought it was...

Sometimes, the rewards of the struggles have a habit of making us forget the pain and the struggles of the journey.

 

But the question is, "How do you know what the outcome will be until you are WILLING to try?"

Spiritual Engineer

For those who don't know, I am what most people would describe as a Shaman. A Shaman is an ancient Siberian word to describe a person who is in communication with the spirit world and the plane in which we exist physically. There are TONS of different types of Shamans and there all are products of their experiences and their culture. So the most typical image of a Shaman for Western Cultures is the Medicine Man or Woman from the Native American Cultures. However, there are others out there, mostly in tribal cultures, such as among the Aborigines (Australia), Eskimo (Alaska), Sami (Lapland, Finland), Mongolians, Siberia, Mali (Africa), Peruvian (South American), and the list goes on and on.

On a personal level, after my trip to Korea to answer a lot of all consuming questions concerning my personal identity, I was informed that along the female lineage, my family had a lot of healers. As being a Mudang (Shaman) in Korea placed you in the very low social class, so my family started distancing itself from the title to avoid the stigma of being a Shaman. My mother tried to suppress this information from me, but through my cousin, I found out that one of my Korean Aunts is a practicing Mudang and that this was our heritage. Now this didn't necessarily make me automatically think that I was a Shaman, but rather it was picking up one Shaman book after another and realizing that I was already doing these practices but in my own ways. The intent to remove lost or attached spirit entities was there, I just didn't do things like walk up blade stairs to do it. ;o)

The picture below is a Mudang, who is about to perform the blade stair case ritual. In which she will walk up the blade step to the top platform. This is done as a way to frighten the evil spirits that are around because they can see how powerful she is by performing such a dangerous feat! I took this photo at the Andong mask festival when I was in Korea.

 
Based on what I had witnessed and learned about Shamanism, I was still very reluctant to call myself a Shaman, until one day, it just hit me that the title wasn't for me, but rather it was for those who did not know me. A place for people to start before they dove in to the information that I had to offer.

Although, I have to say, I rather like the description that my good friend TM offered up the term, "Spiritual Engineer." An engineer is someone who takes theories and use them for practical purposes. Well, I pretty much operate in the same way when it comes to spiritual matters, take these practices and use them to make our physical lives better. That really describes me very well. I'm a problem solver, that's for sure. 

That's something I found rather frustrating about Psychology Research. It seems like they just begin the process, trying to pinpoint what the issues are, but then they don't seem to do anything with what they found. It seems like the information is then left and they start over to find other ways in which they get to the same "problem." Which it is good to get an idea as to what the various triggers are, but eventually you need to actually deal with the problem itself. Perhaps they look at the other side of the equation once you get past the Undergraduate stage, not sure, but frustrating for a problem solver such as myself.

Yet, the more I travel this road, the more that I am realizing that it's really the PROCESS that matters, not the end result.  In other words, it's what you saw and did on your journey to XX, not you being at XX.  Watch the movie "Up!" and you'll see the message there.